Transitions

This transition is long, and I don't know how to navigate it. I want to live fully here as long as I am. But I can't forget that I'm going. I can't let things slide. There is work involved in the going, and I can't forfeit it. I can't take a pass and say it'll all come together in the end.

I'm divided. 

And I lean on myself a lot. I bank on my skills or my talent or my past successes. It will be ok because I know I can do this. A lot of lies and a lot of pressure. 

But The Lord is the strength of his people, a fortress of salvation for his annointed one (Ps. 28:8). These things do not depend upon me. The Cabin, my small group, Slovakia. They depend upon the Sovereign Creator. 

I'm also discovering that I'm a self-worshipper. I think we all are. I think that is the root of sin. But knowing that means nothing until you know it. Until you feel it in the tightness of your chest and the bitterness in the back of your throat. Until you're sitting in bed and you can't fall asleep because He's showing you yourself. The ugly and the misguided. 

Self-worship is fear and doubt. It's pressure and heavy and overwhelming. It's confusion. It's everything you, and you are so weak. 

But I love his strength beecause it is satisfying and full. It trades pressure for peace, chaos for calm, and I can breath when He is on the throne. 

To be worshipped is His right, and to worship Him is my joy.

Clap your hands, all you nations; 

shout to God with cries of joy.

For the Lord Most High is awesome,

the great King over all the earth.

He subdued nations under us,

peoples under our feet.

He chose our inheritance for us,

the pride of Jacob, whom he loved.

God has ascended amid shouts of joy,

the Lord amid the sounding of trumpets.

Sing praises to God, sing praises;

sing praises to our King, sing praises.

For God is the King of all the earth;

sing to him a psalm of praise.

God reigns over the nations;

God is seated on his holy throne.

The nobles of the nations assemble

as the people of the God of Abraham,

for the kings of the earth belong to God;

he is greatly exalted.

(Pslam 47)

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Slovakia update:
Support raising seems to be going well. Money is rolling in slowly but steadily, and I am still shooting for a November departure. If a financial donation is something you're interested in you can go to Josiah Venture's website, click on their Give page and search me by last name.
Thank you for your continued prayers and support! I love having you walk beside me in this journey.